


Good for Goodness Sake

by Redrikki



Category: Ms. Marvel (Comics)
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Christmas, Christmas is not for everyone, Female Character of Color, Gen, Harm to Children, Kidnapping, Muslim Character, White Privilege, Women Being Awesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-13
Updated: 2014-12-13
Packaged: 2018-03-01 06:32:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2763173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redrikki/pseuds/Redrikki
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's hard enough being an American Muslim at Christmas time.  Then the Inventor had to go and make it worse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Good for Goodness Sake

Kamala pushed open the door to the Circle Q and was assaulted by the tinny sound of musac Christmas carols. The halls were thoroughly decked and even the LED lights on the stunted little tree seemed to twinkled aggressively. She always dreaded coming here in December and now, here was Christmas, earlier than ever and invading her secret headquarters. Stupid Christmas.

“Ugh, Christmas,” Nakia grumbled, echoing Kamala’s thoughts.

“Sorry,” Bruno apologized. “The manager thinks it ‘festive,’” he added with requisite air quotes. “We just started with the music Sunday and I already want to jam a pencil in my ear.”

Zoe glared at them from the coffee counter. “God, what’s wrong with you guys? How can you not like Christmas?”

Pretty easily actually. Sometimes the whole month of December felt like everyone shouting ‘FREAK’ at her every time she walked into a store or turned on the TV or did anything that wasn’t sitting at home and staring at the wall. “Ah, you get that we’re Muslims, right?”

“Christmas isn’t about religion.” Zoe somehow managing to keep a straight face despite the complete ridiculousness she was spouting. “The true spirit of Christmas is for everyone.”

“Crass commercialism?” Nakia suggested dryly, gesturing to the rack of holiday-themed instant lottery scratch-offs. “Nothing says Christmas quite like gambling.”

“Ugh! You are such a Grinch,” Zoe snapped. She practically threw her money at Bruno and stormed out the door.

Kamala sighed. It was going to be a long December.

****

Just seven more shopping days until Christmas and Kamala was fighting a giant robot reindeer, like, for reals. It had stupid little antlers, a red laser emitter for a nose, and everything. The Inventor probably thought it was ‘festive.’ If it wasn’t for the deluded teenager who was probably stuck inside, Kamala would happily embiggen until she was the size of a house and drop kick the thing into the next county.

“Okay,” she huffed as she dodged yet another laser blast. “You’re not like the other reindeer. Believe me, I get it.” She rolled off to the side and reached out to smash the emitter with a crunch. She gave its face an extra squeeze for good measure.

“Got your — ow!” she yelped as Robot Rudolf tossed his head and managed to sliced up the underside of her arm with his surprisingly sharp horns. Okay, more fighting less quipping. The big-time superheroes all made this look so effortless. Kamala could hardly make it through a fight without taking some kind of damage. Shape shifting and healing were totally awesome but she really needed some actual combat training one of these days.

The robot lowered its head to charge and this time Kamala embiggened so that it galloped right between her giant legs. She bent down and snatched it up. Its flailed its head and its hooves churned wildly as it struggled to get free. The robot’s beeping turned frantic as Kamala pawed at it looking for a way in. She hit the magic button and the whole back panel few off.

Below her, Lockjaw gave a startled yelp. Kamala glanced down and saw the panel stuck quivering just inches from her giant dog’s giant nose. “Sorry, boy,” she called before turning back to the task at hand. “Oh, god.” The Inventor’s latest human battery wasn’t some disaffected teenage runaway. She was a cherubic little back girl with chunky braids and green hair bows.

Kamala shrank back to normal so fast that she almost ended up crushing herself under the robot. She frantically ripped off the electrodes and wires with trembling hands. The little girl’s head lolled back against Kamala’s chest as she pulled her clear. She’d been stripped down to her underwear and was shaking with cold and shock. The sight of the tiny pink bow on her undershirt hit Kamala harder than any robot punch. All the other human batteries were still in a coma. How could anyone do that to an innocent child?

The girl began to stir as Lockjaw whined and sniffed her face. “Is Santa here?” she slurred, blinking dazedly. “We’re going to his workshop,” she added before drifting off again.

Lockjaw made a low, angry noise at the back of his enormous throat. Kamala hefted her tiny burden and patted his head. "Okay, boy, let’s take her to the hospital. Then we go kick Santa’s butt!”

****

MS. MARVEL RESCUES MISSING GIRL

JERSEY CITY - RaeBindi Bendis (5) was dropped off at Jersey City Medical Center by Jersey City’s own Ms. Marvel late Thursday afternoon. Bendis disappeared from Hudson Mall on December 7th while shopping with her aunt.

“Praise Jesus for giving us our baby back,” said mother CindyLu Bendis (29). “Thank you everyone who prayed for RaeBindi and helped with the search. Thank you Ms. Marvel.”

Bendis remains unconscious from her ordeal but is reported to be in stable condition. Police are continuing to investigate. Bendis was the first of two girls to go missing from Hudson Mall this shopping season. Maggie Young (6), who disappeared on December 13th, has yet to be found. Her family remains hopeful. Persons with any information about either case are asked to call the police tip line at 555-8477.

*****  
Bruno frowned as they read the article on the _Jersey Journal_ website during study hall. “And she said Santa took her?” He shook his head. “Is nothing sacred?”

“She said they were going to his workshop,” Kamala clarified. She opened a new tab on her browser and went to the Hudson Mall website. There were nine hours of Santa photo shoots every day between November 22nd and Christmas. It was mind boggling. “I never got the whole Santa thing. Why lie about where presents come from?”

“Tradition?” Bruno shrugged. In second grade he’d run crying to her house after his parents confessed to lying about Santa. Possibly not the best tradition, really. “Maybe they just want us to get used to being lied to by authority figures.”

Kamala fidgeted with her mouse, toggling back and forth from mall Santa to missing girls and back again. She might not always like what they said, but she trusted her parents to tell the truth. Was that naive? Maybe, but was it dangerous? The girls would never have wandered off with some random dude at the mall if they hadn’t bought into the whole Santa myth.

She switched back to the article. ReaBindi Bendis and Maggie Young smiled out at her from the screen in their school-photo best. Their parents’ lies may have made them vulnerable, but the Inventor never would have gone after them if it wasn’t for Kamala. “Bruno,” she asked in a horrified whisper, “Do you think this is my fault?”

“What?” Bruno started at her incredulously. “How could this possibly be your fault?”

“I broke up the Harvest.” All those grown-ups had tried to warn her off the Inventor and Kamala had gone blundering ahead anyway. She stopped a hold-up and got shot. She tried to rescue Vic and got her butt kicked. She destroyed one robot and lead another straight to her school. And now this. “Sometimes it’s like, I try to help, but I just make things worse.”

“Kamala.” Bruno slung his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. “You know I’m that last person to encourage you to do something crazy and get yourself hurt, but you really do help people. And, well,” he took a deep breath and recited halting, “Surely Allah commands justice and the doing of good, and giving to the kindred, and He forbids indecency and evil and rebellion.”

Kamala pulled away and stared in shock. “Did you just...quote the Qur’an?” A bubble of happy warmth swelled up from her chest and exploded across her face in a ferocious blush. Bruno had taken the time to learn about her faith. No, more than that. He’d gone and memorized at least some of the Qur’an because he knew it was important to her.

Bruno looked awkwardly away and swallowed hard. His burning ears matcher her burning face. “So, ah, you gonna call the tip line?”

She should call and let the police handle it. She should go home, focus on her studies and be the good girl her parents wanted. Except Kamala couldn’t do that. God and wacky ancient space aliens had given her superpowers and with that came great responsibility and craziness. Maybe the police would believe her story about the Inventor and the kidnapping Santa. Maybe they’d even manage to arrest him eventually. In the meantime, Kamala owed it to those kids to do everything she could to save them.

Kamala crammed her laptop into her bag. “ _You_ call.” She swung her bag over her shoulder and posed, hands on hips and chest out thrust, like a hero on a poster. “ _I’ve_ got an evil mall Santa to find.” She marched toward the door, determination in every step. She was going to do this and, for once, she was going to do this right.

“And just where do you think you’re going Miss Khan?”

Right, school. The blush was back with a vengeance and Kamala had to struggle not to shrink as she slunk awkwardly back to her seat. Someone in the back of the room sniggered and she buried her face in her arms. “Ugh, so much for my dramatic hero exit.”

Bruno patted her consolingly on the shoulder. “At least now I can help you plan.”

Yeah, that would be good, Kamala thought. Certainly better than going off half-cocked like usual. She smiled up at Bruno. He really was the best sidekick/support staff a girl could ask for.

****  
If it were a movie, her stakeout would be over in, like, ten minutes of sitting around with binoculars and chugging coffee. In reality, it was four hours of screaming toddlers and endless repetitions of “What would you like for Christmas.” After some discussion and planning, they'd agreed that, since both the kidnappings had taken place on a Sunday, that was probably the best time for an evil Santa hunt. Kamala’s parents thought she was studying chemistry with Bruno and Nakia and, right now, she honestly wished she could have brought her text book.

The whole mall Santa operation ran like a well-oiled machine. The milling crowd of antsy kids and bored parents were herded and managed by a small army of elves. They whisked children to and from Santa’s lap, manned the camera and stood armed with candy canes, paper towels and bottled water, ready for any emergency. Kamala watched it all from her perch atop Santa’s throne. 

The man himself was cheerfully avuncular if not exactly jolly. He didn’t take off running with anyone’s child, offer to take anyone to his secret workshop or do anything worse then swear under his breath after being accidentally kneed in the groin. Kamala was seriously starting to think that she was wasting her time and risking being grounded for nothing when the Santa machine suddenly ground to a halt. 

“Where are your parents?” A she-elf asked, looking around for someone to pass a little boy off to. They should have been waiting off to the side ready to receive their child and photo, but there was no one there. 

“Dad’s shopping,” he told her and Kamala shook her head. Who left their son alone at a mall with a kidnapper on the loose? Did this kid's dad _want_ him to get snatched? He certainly made the perfect target. 

Meanwhile, the line was backing up and Santa was frantically gesturing for help with the shrieking toddler peeing in his lap. “I’ve got this,” another elf swooped in to take the boy in hand and Kamala nearly fell off her perch in shock. The hat hid his stupid mohawk, but it was definitely Doyle, the Inventor’s chief-head-boy-minion-guy. She’d know that voice anywhere.

Doyle crouched down in front of the boy as Kamala frantically scrambled to climb down without breaking her neck. “Do you want to see Santa’s workshop?” he asked. “He’s got a special toy there just for you.”

The kid nodded excitedly and reached out to take Doyle’s hand. It was now or never if she wanted to put an end to the whole operation. No more time for climbing. Kamala dove off the back of the throne and landed on Doyle’s elf hat with a grunt and a cacophony of jingle bells. She dodged the hand he raised to straighten the hat and crouched behind the wide band of green felt as he took them deep into the bowels of Hudson Mall. 

Santa’s secret evil workshop was a cramped workspace hidden behind a false wall in the basement. The floor was cluttered with tangles of wires, greasy fast food containers, and mounds of tools and random bits of metal. A pair of giant nutcracker robots dominated the room. The one on the right stood ready for action with it's sword drawn and it's hat brushing the ceiling, but it was the one on the left which worried her. It's hat was pushed back, it's battery chamber open and waiting to drain the Inventor's latest victim. Well, it wouldn't get him, not while Kamala was on the job. 

“Is that for me?" The boy asked in an awed whisper. He stroked the robot's leg possessively and grinned. "Best present ever!"

Doyle clapped the boy on his shoulder and steered him away from the robots. He led him to the far corner and a tray full of needles. "It's all yours, kid," he said, rolling back the boy's sleeve. "We just need to get you-" He broke off with a surprised grunt and faceplanted hard as Kamala embiggened on top of his head. His nose met the floor with a crunch, but she had more important things to worry about.

“Rescue time, kiddo." Kamala swooped the boy up and bolted for the exit. For the first few steps he hung in her arms like dead weight, but then he started to yell and squirm and _bite_. "Ow! What the heck?" He was lucky she didn't just drop his ungrateful butt. Did he seriously not get what was happening here? 

“Bendy girl!” Doyle snarled behind her. His voice sounded wet and muffled thanks to the blood streaming from his broken nose. "Nutcrackers attack!" 

Kamala shoved the kid towards the door. "Run." She dropped to her knees to avoid the sword swing that would have taken off her head and rolled to her feet. With two over-sized robots and all the junk, the space was just too tight to get big enough to go toe-to-toe. That was okay though. She just needed to keep it distracted long enough for the boy to escape and then she could lure it someplace with enough room to fight. Or something. The trick, Kamala realized as she dodged another slash of the robot's sword, was to stay alive that long. Thank God she only had the one robot to deal with.

She heaved the empty robot into it's twin. They collided with a clang and went down hard. "Well, that was easy," Kamala said which was, of course, when the universe decided to remind her that life is never that easy by throwing a robot at her. She barely had time to duck before the other nutcracker charged her. For something that was technically inanimate, it certainly seemed pissed. Kamala scrambled backwards and ended up falling over the shattered wreck of it's brother. 

The robot raised it's sword high and Kamala waited until the last possible second to dodge out of the way. The blade bit deep into the other nutcracker and stuck there. The robot made a seriously annoyed-sounding series of beeps as it struggled to free its weapon. She took advantage of it's distraction to hit the battery-chamber release button. The nutcracker's hat slid forward as the whole machine powered down. "Okay. _Now_ that was easy."

“Arrrrgggg” Doyle screamed as he collided with her and took her to the floor. His first punch caught her full in the face and left her seeing stars. Kamala barely managed to get her arms up in time to block the next one. "YOU ALWAYS RUIN EVERYTHING!" He yelled, practically foaming at the mouth. Each word was punctuated by another blow to her forearms.

Enough of this, Kamala thought, and slammed him in the face with her elbow. As Doyle reeled back she made an extra big fist and swung for the cheap seats. He seemed to hang in mid-air for a moment before hitting the floor several feet away with a dull thud and a groan. He didn't get up.

Kamala pulled herself to her feet and marveled at her handiwork. A pair of trashed robots. Not one, but two kidnapped kids rescued. And best of all, Doyle was totally going to jail. Probably with a quick detour to a hospital to make sure Kamala hadn't given him brain damage, but after? Yeah, straight to the slammer. Take that Inventor and every adult who doubted her. 

She heard a noise by the door and turned to find that the little boy was still standing there. Hadn't she told him to run? What happened to children listening to their elders? "Are you alright?"

The boy's breath hitched and his eyes looked suspiciously moist. "You beat up Santa's elf."

"His evil kidnapping elf." She was totally rocking this hero thing. 

"You broke my toy," he wailed and burst into tears.

******

MS. MARVEL FOILS KIDNAPPER was the front page headline in the next morning's _Jersey Journal._ Okay, so it was just the front page of the Metro section, but it was above the fold and that was practically the big times. It even had photographs of the wrecked robots and everything. 

"Hey," Bruno greeted Kamala and Nakia as they walked into the Circle Q. "Check it out." He slid the paper down to them. "Our Ms. Marvel's pretty awesome, right?"

 _Good job,_ he mouthed as Nakia leaned over the newspaper. Man, there was just something about Bruno's approval. It almost made up for the hours of Santa watching and the fact that she never actually got around to studying for that afternoon's chemistry test. 

"This guy seriously used Santa to kidnap people?" Nakia asked, her tone equal parts horror and disgust. "God, what is wrong with some people?" 

She flipped the paper over, exposing story about someone giving an actual gold doubloon worth thousands of dollars to a Salvation Army bell ringer. Strange how the holiday could bring out the best and the absolute worst in people. "Dude, Christmas is nuts." 

“Oh, my god, I know," said Zoe as she brought up her Monday morning coffee. "And do you know what the worst part is?” She asked, fishing through her purse for exact change.

It was a tough call. Between holiday-themed robots, ungrateful kidnap victims, and the inexplicable popularity of that super-depressing “Christmas Shoes” song there was a lot to chose from.

“They’re actually making us go to school today even though Christmas is on Thursday,” Zoe answered her own question. “I mean, what if I wanted to fly to Florida to be with my grandmother or whatever?”

“We don’t get any time off for Mawlid,” Kamala pointed out. She had to take an un-excused absence every year to celebrate the birth of the Prophet.

“Yeah," said Zoe looking confused. “But that’s, like, some Muslim thing. This is Christmas.”


End file.
